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My Life Journey
Remembering my childhood, in a small NJ community, I am filled with fun and loving memories. Family life was great, but a little crazy, living in a home full of Italians. Let’s just say it was exciting and adventurous. Family gatherings with lots of people and entertaining parties were the norm in my household. My family was in the restaurant business, so food was not only a part of our lives, but our heritage as well. At a young age I learned to cook and helped my mom prepare the Sunday feast. This was a great time in my life, I learned the value of using fresh produce from our own organic family garden, and we took pride in cooking and preparing the meals ourselves. These experiences helped develop my creative cooking skills, along with my desire to please the people we were cooking for. As you can imagine, our Italian diet was rich in many foods such as cheese, dairy, red meats, pork and poultry and plenty of bread and pastas. This rich Italian diet, I so proudly prepared with my mother, was probably not the best thing for me and my health.
As a young boy, and even into my teen years, I was an over-active kid, playing sports and running around with friends. Sports played a major role in my life and I played just about everything, excelling in football, baseball and soccer. I remember running from after-school soccer practice to Pop Warner football and not getting home until well after dark.
It was at this early age that my competitive
person was evolving, having the drive to succeed in all that I was doing. It was at this
time in my childhood that I began to recognize that my frequent trips to the bathroom and
instances of bowel problems. One memory of this was back in middle school. As I ran as a
part of a four man relay race, in an attempt to break the school record (which we did!), I
feared the occurrence of bowel problems interfering with my performance.
At the age of thirteen, my middle school years, I watched as my family slowly fell apart. The happy-go-lucky family I had was breaking up and life became much different. My oldest brother left home and moved to Florida to follow his sports dreams earlier than expected, and I was left home with my Mom, Dad and oldest sister. This was not a good time in my life, as my once peaceful household was now filled with constant fighting and arguing. Much unhappiness occurred during this time, until Mom and Dad finally decided to split. At this time, my father and sister also moved to Florida, leaving Mom and I behind in our hometown. ‘Family life’ was over and Mom and I began a new life of survival.
Learning a new lifestyle was difficult, but it was an important character-building experience for both my mother and myself. Mom grew as a stronger woman, working hard and supporting me, our home and all that she loved, trying her best to teach me the value of honor and respect. I, however, took a different path. At this time in my life I was very hurt and devastated by the breakup of our family. Pain, anger and resentment filled me and I was venting in many ways. Sports were my way of getting the hatred out and it drove me to become more passionate in all that I did. I can now see how the depression, anger and drive to succeed led to more issues with my digestion and other emotional problems. You could say that at this time in my life I had lost ‘my way’ and became someone lost in his emotions and feelings, feeling as if I had lost control.
It was then, when I was fourteen, that I had the most beautiful and significant experience of my life. To help with the finances, my mother has rented out one of our bedrooms to a family friend, her husband and their baby. This friend invited me to study the Bible and attend church. I experienced the greatness and reality of God; I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and the Savior. The feeling, as indescribable as it may be, was the most beautiful feeling I could have imagined. I was saved from what had been the ugliness in my life, and I knew I could be something better, someone making a positive impact on others and the world. There’s a lot to learn when you’re a new Christian. I quickly ran into many trials and tribulations. My Journey, my real journey, had begun.
I still enjoyed sports, and my high school years were
years of exciting competitions.
I made friends that I still have today, and I shared life and good times with my high school sweetheart.
My friends were supportive; they helped me get
through my parents’ divorce, and their love replaced the love I had lost from my brother
and father.
I learned independence; Mom worked two and often three jobs just to keep a
roof over our heads, so I learned to be an adult: cooking, cleaning, and essentially
running the household on my own. I continued to love and learn more about cooking. I loved
experimenting with 
foods and developing my culinary skills. I
made dinner almost nightly, being honored to cook for my hard-working mother and share
mealtimes with her.
Still hurt and angry over the divorce, the loss of the relationships I shared with my brother and father, and my health issues, my emotional state was not great. It was at this time that I realized how much of my unstable emotional health was affected by my health issues and with graduation right around the corner; I had concerns about my future.
Any chances of advancing further in sports had
become unpromising and my culinary possibilities became a financial burden.
Holding onto my faith, I decided to go with my God given talent and became a creative artist and designer. I bought my first screen printing machines and started my own company in 1986. I worked at several jobs and learned to be a businessman, a hard worker with a deep desire to succeed and to gain the respect of others. In fact, I was desperately seeking the approval of others. I was a workaholic. I’d learned “the value of hard work” from my mother and family, but now I was learning the true cost of those values.
My screen printing company was exciting and I became a pretty good artist, learning how to service my customers and keep them satisfied by my work. While working in my shop and printing textiles I was around many carcinogenetic in the chemicals and the materials I was using.
Glancing back into my life I remember a
friend, who was a chemist, once tell me that I would have health issues if I didn’t protect
myself from the chemicals I was handling. During this time I also worked as a house painter
and was handling paints, thinners and other chemicals. Was my health being compromised by
my work, the one thing I loved? …was this an issue and a health concern?
Athletics was still a big part of my life. I had moved on from the competitive team sports, but I continued to work-out and began to train competitively in power lifting and body building.
My friends and I went to the gym often, sometimes two
or three times a day.
We spent a good deal of time eating healthy foods, learning how to prepare them, and growing in our knowledge of nutrition. Several of my friends became nationally-recognized body builders. I created a line of clothing that would fit our oversized bodies and stroke our oversized egos.
I had slipped away from God and grown completely
focused on myself. I started using steroids and other drugs, and of course, they
contributed to my health problems and took a toll on my body in more ways than one. I once
again filled with anger and aggression. In 1992 I was incarcerated for distribution of
steroids.
Almost losing my business and my mother’s respect I learned a valuable
lesson and re-united with my faith. While I was faced with an awful situation, I took this
and I grew into a better more grounded person. During this time
away I learned valuable life skills and started to read more books and educated myself in
many fields of health and wellness. I got grounded and realized that I was really damaging
my life and it was time to clean up my act. Prison was a time for healing and looking at my
life from a distance…I knew it was time for a change.
At the age of twenty seven I decided to leave my home in New Jersey and
move to Florida. I joined my family and got away from the ugly that was in my past. Mom
stayed, but promised she would sell our house one day and come join her children. This was
a huge move for me for several reasons, one of which was leaving the security of my home
and my friends. Picking up my business and leaving 10 years of established clientele. It
was scary yet exciting, and I started a new chapter, in a new place, with new
opportunities, and new people.
Florida gave me time to share with my family, to excel in my career and explore other opportunities. I lived next to an inspiring girl who was learning massage therapy and we became great friends. She taught me all she had learned and we studied together everyday. This experience, like my experiences with food, was fascinating to me. Learning about the body, the muscles, how they work, the benefits of massage and the wellness that was connected to it was amazing. As a body builder in New Jersey, I was not unfamiliar with massage therapy, but now I was learning the details and principles. Then something happened that would change me forever.
In early 1999 I began suffering from digestive pains and bowel problems. Not sure what the problem could be, I headed to the hospital. By the time I left I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis, an inflammatory bowel disease. I was devastated and was very concerned, so I went home to my computer and learned everything about the disease. It was at that moment that I started eating healthier and declared war on Ulcerative Colitis.
I was on pharmaceuticals at the time, but knew I
didn’t want to be on them for long. I fought hard to clean up my diet and created a sense
of peace in my life that would help me with my stress. I found a beautiful place on the
beach and decided to get my life to a happy healthier spot.
I was successful and went into remission for a couple
years. I also was off my meds and was happy to be clean from big pharmas drugs.
In late 2000 I lost my mom to lung cancer, and was devastated. I was heart broken that she never made it to Florida to enjoy a more peaceful life with her children. My mom was the hardest working person I have ever known, and watching her battle a disease, brought on by bad choices (smoking) made me wonder what bad choices I had made to put my bowels in a uproar and causing me to have a battle of my own. The loss of my mother put me in massive depression, causing my digestive problems to flare. My emotional state was again at an all time low.
In 2001 with the country’s 9-11 crisis, I went into post traumatic depression, crying everyday and watching the miserable news cast over and over again. Anger set in and things were getting bad, emotionally and physically. At this moment I lost my faith in everything. I questioned and analyzed everything; what was going on, what was so wrong in my life and why was this happening in our country. The pain kept coming and wouldn’t go away.
In 2002 I fell apart. My Ulcerative Colitis came back with a vengeance, so I started juicing, trying vegan diets and got back on my pharmaceuticals, but nothing worked. I was housebound and fighting for my life. I had now lost the ability to work and I was going to the bathroom 20-60 times a day.
My stomach was a mess and my life was falling apart. I
tried so hard to get it under control, but I could not figure it out. I was 220 lbs and in
fairly good shape when this occurred, but by the time I was rushed to the hospital I was
120 lbs and dying.
I was rushed into ICU and was under cardiac arrest. I watched as the doctors stuck tubes and electrodes all over me. I was being injected with antibiotics and drugs, which probably did more damage than good. Thank God one doctor who came in my room and was totally at wits end, seeing me on all these drugs. Immediately he told the nurses to take me off them. I slowly recovered in the hospital and was released and sent home. Weak and drawn out, I just laid in bed everyday and hoped things would get better.
My once physically fit body was now struggling to
walk. The pain was so excruciating that a wheelchair was my only alternative. Finally, the
doctors diagnosed me with Rheumatoid Arthritis, caused by the leaky gut syndrome, connected
to ulcerative colitis. The arthritis was just one more obstacle to overcome. I was lost, at
the end of my rope. Even though God was always in my corner, I never reached out for him. I
even studied and considered other religions and options, but still nothing worked, nothing
changed my agonizing life. I’m thankful for a couple of great friends who took care of me
and saw me through. I made it one day at a time.
I continued my studies of health and wellness,
educating myself about organic foods and cooking, alternative medicines and treatments,
herbs, and supplements. A desire rose in me to find a way to help not only myself but also
others facing my condition. I also learned about contaminants in our environment – even the
common ones in our households. I researched and sought out products that would help me
create a healthier body and a healthier home. My wheelchair, walker, and cane were
hindrances to me. I knew that my life was not supposed to be about illness and bondage. I
wanted to be set free. I was supposed to be doing something bigger, better, positive and
constructive.
One night, after a day of frequent bowel movements, maybe 30 or 40, tired and discouraged, frustrated with life, I experienced “MY Epiphany” with God. The lord took me from misery to my quest. It was at this moment that I knew what he wanted from me. That night was filled with hatred, anger, resentment and frustration and it was spoken out loud to the God I knew loved me. I NEED YOUR HELP!!! (not in such kind words) I went from Pain and Suffering to Hope and Grace. That morning I woke up still on the toilet, knowing I had work to do. With the help of my Savior; I would become an educator, motivator, and mentor, showing people what I had learned through my humbling experiences and life lessons. It took several years to get back on track and fight this debilitating disease, losing the vision in my left eye do to the arthritis and battling the disabilities in front of me, I stayed focused and found the strength and drive to be a competitor again and win this battle.
This journey took me through the good, the bad, and the ugly. It took me from wheelchair to walker to cane. Now, I am recovering at 80%-90% mobility and sharing my life with so many special people. Eating healthy and organically, treating my body as it deserves, giving to others and spreading the knowledge of health and wellness is a blessing that can not be over weighed by pity or being self centered. I learned a life lesson, but more importantly, learned about my inner self; who and what I am. I’m truly blessed and I’m honored to share this story with you.
I have converted my home into a healthy home, and teach others about healthy living. I am also in the process of setting up an organic cooking show that will demonstrate how fun, exciting and delicious organic eating can be!
These 5 years of life learning experiences has brought me to this place in my life. As difficult as they were, they have given me the strength and courage to become who I am now. They have allowed me to connect with my faith, my life and the special people that continue to support and love me. I am humbled by their support and proud to be who I am.
My Journey and My battle were at a cost, but that cost was worth every minute of it.
I BECAME A HEALTHY CREATION
